Thursday, February 5, 2009

letters, feb. 09

dear belgish family [formerly of next door],
i am sad you have moved away. i miss hearing your whiny one-year-old in the mornings and your blond three-year-old babbling away in your crazy language when i get home at night. i miss seeing you eat your dinner out on the patio and watching you clip your toenails out by the pool. [okay, i do NOT miss that one. i almost barfed the one time i saw this in action.] i miss you knocking on my door to ask for a blow dryer because said one-year-old spilled a glass of water on your laptop (for the second time. keep the laptop -- and water -- away from the baby!).
i do keep myself entertained with theories on why you left so suddenly. maybe you were illegal aliens. maybe you were spies. maybe our crazy landlord decided she hates foreigners. whatever the case, i miss you. and i hope your replacements are nice and appreciate my baking like you did.

dear rain,
i love you. especially when i'm inside.
but when i have to walk to the train and get wet, i do not love you that much.
NOR do i love what you do to all the california wackos who do NOT know how to drive when it rains.

dear american idol,
you are bugging me.
i've never seen h-wood week before but decided to give you a chance. now i am regretting that decision. i think last night you decided to pack in as many ridiculously annoying people as humanly possible to see just how far you could push me before i went over the edge.
where are the good singers? why do you kick people off without even showing us their performance? why don't you even NAME half the people still around?
i work in media. i get it. you want a marketable person with a compelling story. but I do not want to watch all that drama in the meantime! there's a reason i don't watch the hills, you know.


Jean said...

That's too bad that your poolside nail clippers are gone. (Haha... I would've almost barfed too.) But seriously, sounds like they were interesting and entertaining.

Boo to rain. It's rough being cooped up with a baby!! And I don't watch AI. I can't take it anymore.

Nat said...

Seriously, AI! What's the deal? I don't remember Hollywood week every sucking this bad. It just got worse and worse...

sachia said...

The "dear belgish family" is making me wish I know them...we'll sort of. I guess what I'm trying ot say is that they would fir in at CHristmas. The toenail clippers is something that I can't stand. I think it's because I've had someone clip them on my sofa while eating dinner. Ya, that's the kindof relatives I have. Yay.

Brandon and Erica said...

LOVE the letters! Hilarious about the Belgish family....does that mean they are Belgian? Never heard the word Belgish, so I thought it was supposed to be a bodily sound or something.

P.S. I agree about H-wood week..>STUPID! Honestly, let's get straight to TOP 24!

Angela and Mike said...

I love that your foot phobia comes thru on all your posts. haha. Clipping the toenails by the pool. Gross.

dana said...

hooray for more letters. I love these.
And while I agree with your American Idol comments, I thought Hollywood week was AWESOME fun entertainment. We'll get to the good people soon enough.